“Trying Not to Try” is a photographic series depicting remnants of materials related to my reproductive health journey. Just as these commodities are tied to our personal identities as consuming beings, objects and their associations similarly come to consume us as well – whether they are the inedible silica gel packs in every ovulation predictor test kit or samples of baby formula that did not end up getting used due to an early pregnancy loss. Normally discarded, the accumulated items are a manifestation of shifting maternal desire and grief, also representing traces of a body struggling to respond to loss and not-knowing.

An incomplete six years of Yasmin, Yaz and Zarah, 11 in x 11 in, lightjet print, 2018

Keepsakes from each used OPK so far, 11 in x 11 in, lightjet print, 2018

Free samples that wouldn’t have make it on time for June 25 anyway, 11 in x 11 in, lightjet print, 2018